Can't Catch Me

Wake up: 5 to get the baby. 6 for real.
Slept for: I really don't know what time I fell asleep last night. I know it was before I finished folding the laundry. I wish there were a laundry folding fairy. I guess they're actually called housekeepers.
First thought is: I have so much time to do all the things I want to do like put in another laundry, edit an article, return emails before I go to the gym. Seriously, this was my thought and it made me happy. I love having time to get a jump on things. Waking up early is a key factor in my overall happiness because it helps me to feel in control. I highly recommend it.
Baby is: On day four (or so) of a real baby schedule which includes sleeping through the night, cat-napping from 6 to 11-ish and then mega-napping from 11 to 3 or so. Eventually, he will convert his...sorry, I had to go, he got up. I'm hoping it's just a slight awake pause in his marathon of sleep. I better not talk about this anymore. I think I am angering the parenting gods.
This is: Nothing. Forget it. I said nothing about a schedule or sleep. Never mind any of it.
Daughter is: Out with her sitter, a gem of a girl who's been in our lives for two years now. We got lucky with her.
This is: Comforting. She's smart, responsible, patient and conscientious and having her spend time with Scarlett doesn't make me feel guilty about not spending the time with her myself.
Man is: I am going to email him to find out. He is downstairs in his office, by the way. He says: Still here.
This is: Going to plague me for hours, days, weeks, as to its meaning, when it probably means nothing. Oh, just got a follow-up email with subject line "Just Kidding" and text that reads: Man is not that grouchy today. Gratuitous wonderment and ill-drawn conclusions averted.
Emails to check: I think there where a decent amount, but it's been six hours since I checked them and millions of thoughts, fears, hopes, dreams have replaced that speck of info.
Goal for the day: Pay very close attention to my words and, hence, my thoughts.
Kabbalah says: "Keep working, moving forward, sharing and caring about the people who cross your path. You'll get your slice in due time. The harder you work for it, the tastier it'll be."
First bananas thought: Harvey Weinstein would be good on this project. He thinks big and takes chances.
Arrive at gym: 8:00 am
Workout is: Good. Not enough time for weights—I just got there 20 minutes too late. I did have time for 36 minutes of cardio on the Precor, levels 5 and 6 of the weight loss program. I cannot stress enough how much better it is to do the preprogrammed workouts. I'll do pushups, dips and free weights at home today. And know that I've typed it out, I have to do it.
Today's song is: Can't Catch Me by Lita Ford
Best lyric is: Don't think I'm easy—I wasn't born blonde
Best spam subject line: Don't be shy
It's the best because: It makes me think of Kajagoogoo. Anything that makes me think of 1983 is the best.
I want: A local all-night (or at least late night) pedicure and manicure place. I think it'd be a hit with the suburban moms—especially if they served drink-drinks.
I love: Do-overs.
I wish: I could see around the corner.
I am totally, majorly obsessing over: Money.
Being a mom means: Stopping what you are doing, getting up from the computer and taking a minute be there for your child.
Being a wife means: Dividing and conquering.
Being a business owner means: Using what you got.
Out of the mouths of babes: Mama, I want you. Oh, forget it. Daddy's coming.
Today I ate: Good—pretty similar to yesterday's menu but I had oatmeal and berries for breakfast.
Today I drank: Coffee, green tea, water.
Work was: Productive. I know something big is brewing.
Today I learned: What you focus on expands.
I am: Going to stay focused on watching what I focus on.
Tomorrow I will:

This is Radio Clash

Wake up: 4:45 am (I think)
Slept for: 6 or so hours
First thought is: Way too tired to think.
Baby is: Probably fine even though he is stirring.
This is: Loud. Stirring is freakin' loud.
Daughter is: Tired a lot lately because we've been putting her to bed to late.
This is: Stopping.
Man is: Grouchy.
This is: Understandable.
Emails to check: 40 something.
Goal for the day: Be proactive. Make a game plan. Enact that game plan.
Kabbalah says: Break an addictive pattern today. Or at least set the intention to do so.
First bananas thought: Oh, today's speeding train of thoughts kicked up so much dust. I'm still coughing.
Arrive at gym: Still haven't gone. I have 45 minutes to build up the mental juice to go.
Workout is: Nothing so far.
Today's song is: This is Radio Clash by The Clash
Best lyric is: Forces have been looting my humanity
Best spam subject line: Hey hottie, wanna talk?
It's the best because: How do they know I'm hot?
I want: To want to go to the gym.
I love: Chocolate ganache and a very many reality TV shows.
I wish: I could better differentiate between reality and fantasy in my mind's eye.
I am totally, majorly obsessing over: Feathered hair.
Being a mom means: Having to examine yourself in one of those close-up mirrors—you know, the ones they have in hotel rooms for some reason—every day.
Being a wife means: Not adding it up.
Being a business owner means: Agility.
Out of the mouths of babes: I didn't mentally record any of Scarlett's gems today. That makes me feel a little sad.
Today I ate: Fruit for breakfast, turkey slices and whole grain, high fiber bread for lunch, half a protein bar (low sugar) for lunch, a turkey meatball for snack and fish and veg for dinner. What an accomplishment! I claim victories wherever and whenever I can. It definitely contributes to my overall happiness.
Today I drank: Water with cucumber slices—so I could pretend I was at a spa.
Work was: All over the place, emotionally, but still productive on the writing and editing-front.
Today I learned: You're in control of your own happiness.
I am: Battling.
Tomorrow I will: Win.

Brass Monkey

Wake up: 5:45 am (I heard the babe stirring). Then I passed back out and woke up at 8:30, feeling groggy and even more tired than before.
Slept for: Over 8 hours.
First thought is: I feel hungover. A quick mind scan of the past 12 hours revealed that it would be impossible for me to be hungover because that would've required drinking alcohol. I concluded that I must have been dehydrated from not drinking enough water yesterday.
Baby is: Big, man. He is super big. We call him Smiles McGee because he's the smiliest baby ever seen.
This is: Interesting. I wonder if he'll be using his smiles for good or up-to-no-good.
Daughter is: Basically a teenager. I asked her if she liked any of the boys at her camp (but I meant liked like like not like-like) and when she told me she did, she lit up. I realized her like was like a like-like.
This is: Agita-inducing. It brought up so many issues of liking boys in 7th grade and them not liking me back. All I could think about was that I hoped that boy liked her, too. What? I am hoping a three year old boy likes my three year old girl? Issues, man. I gots issues.
Man is: I should just let him fill in this blank.
This is: This one, too.
Emails to check: 18.
Goal for the day: Food shopping. Check. Gym. Soon. Work. Check.
Kabbalah says: A good one, so I am going to post the whole thing. And, by the way, you substitute the word "light" or "creator" with words like "your higher self, " "god," "the universe."

Consider the light bulb in your ceiling. You flip a switch, and on it goes. But the light bulb is not the source of the light; the real source is an electric generator somewhere you can't even see. And there are rules around how much light can be emitted as well as when and why. The same is true with the Light of the Creator.

One of the common mistakes we all make is to confuse a person or thing with the Light. For instance, nothing feels as good as falling in love. So naturally we associate our girlfriend or boyfriend with those happy feelings and assume that person is the source of them. But it doesn't work that way. No other person can guarantee us the good feelings of love we are after. It's the way we act in relation to other people that brings the Light.

And that's what today is all about. Remembering that ultimately, your relationship to people and places is about your relationship to the Light of the Creator.
First bananas thought: Was in a dream I had last night about opening a cool juice bar called Juice or Cleanse, where people would go and hang and listen to awesome music and read and do all the stuff that people do in coffee houses.
Arrive at gym: Going in about 20 minutes.
Workout is: 33 minutes of a preprogrammed weight loss workout on the Precor (see "What I learned" below) and upper body (triceps, back, shoulders) supersets, complete with dips and pushups in between the sets.
Today's song is: Brass Monkey by the Beastie Boys
Best lyric is: Like the whole song but if I had to narrow it down:
We're offered Moet - we don't mind Chivas
Wherever we go with bring the Monkey with us
Best spam subject line: Nothing today.
It's the best because: Pass.
I want: Something cute to wear to Anna's baby shower tomorrow.
I love: Butter.
I wish: I were more motivated tonight to finish my work.
I am totally, majorly obsessing over: The mess in my foyer.
Being a mom means: Doing what you say you're going to do.
Being a wife means: This is so interesting to me because I am often so stumped by the question. I mean so stumped that I wonder if I should just change it to "Being a partner means" or "Being in a relationship means."
Being a business owner means: Staying in the ring.
Out of the mouths of babes: "Mom, can I have some of your rolling paper?" She meant wrapping paper.
Today I ate: Salmon sushi roll made with whole grain rice from Whole Foods and vegetables for breakfast. We went shopping early and had breakfast there and the aforementioned were better options over egg and cheese on a roll. Turkey slices and a plum for lunch. Half a protein bar for snack (with no sugar!). Shrimp cocktail, salad and chicken for dinner. Fruit and two cookies for dessert. All that controlled eating was ruined in minute.
Today I drank: Water and a few sips of red wine.
Work was: Good. Still going, though I am fading.
Today I learned: That it's better to do your cardio with one of the preprogrammed workouts. I did the weight loss workout and got my heart rate up to 148 almost immediately. I burned 400 calories in 33 (I think it was 33—it was an odd number) minutes. I usually only burn about 300 to 310 in 30 minutes. Just be sure to raise the resistance level to at least 5. I did the easier parts at 6 and the harder parts at 5. Also, Lori (www.mommy-moves.com) told me that I was not to hold onto the handles anymore when doing my cardio. It makes it much harder, but you're forced to activate (hence, tone) your core and the movement of your arms increases your total body output.
I am: Biting my nails in between answering these questions.
Tomorrow I will: Do better.

History Repeating

Wake up: 5 with the babe, 6 with the alarm.
Slept for: 6 hours.
First thought is: No thoughts at 5. At 6 I thought: I'm just going to go back to bed. But I didn't. I knew I'd regret it an hour later.
Baby is: Repairing the negative feelings and misgivings I had from being a first-time mom.
This is: Amazing. Great. It is so truly amazing-great to see how life works and how, when you trust the process, you are delivered to wholeness.
Daughter is: Watching cartoons. I need to get her on the fast track so we can leave on time for camp.
This is: Always stressful for me, but I really should get a grip. I mean, hello! That is stressful? What is my problem?
Man is: Egging me on with funny—and inappropriate—things to answer this prompt with.
This is: Him.
Emails to check: 30-something again. I keep forgetting to log the number in my sieve—uh, brain, whatever you call it.
Goal for the day: Not stress out over little things. It's almost as if I've mastered not being stressed out over major (may-jah) things, but that dang stress needs to be in the mix, so it riles me up over inconsequential minutia.
Kabbalah says: Why are you alive? What did your soul come here to do? Ask enough times— and with intensity—and you will start seeing signs pointing you in the right direction.
First bananas thought: I can't say that I've had one today. Or, perhaps, they're just all so bonkers that they seem normal.
Arrive at gym: 6:30 am
Workout is: Cardio was a B-. I just lacked focus but I still managed to get my heart rate up and sweat. The good part is that I worked in weights, which is so vital. I bumped into a friend who was working out with a trainer. The trainer said something very interesting about weight loss: 75 percent is nutrition. Boo! And he's so right. I've been pretty good on the eating-front but then I totally spazz out and blow in one fell forkful. Just because you're working out doesn't mean that you can't eat 100 percent cleanly—if you are aiming to achieve a goal. If you're just maintaining, then you can be a little freer.
Today's song is: History Repeating by The Propellerheads
Best lyric is: They say the next big thing is here, that the revolution's near, but to me it seems quite clear that it's all just a little bit of history repeating
Best spam subject line: Your lady will go nuts.
It's the best because: The word "lady" is funny.
I want: The whole red snapper from Indochine.
I love: Manhattan.
I wish: There were a Barneys here. Not that I could buy anything from it right now, but at least I'd have a place to retreat to when the going gets boring.
I am totally, majorly obsessing over: A Spanish-style ranch.
Being a mom means: That point in the day when you go from loving the quiet in the house to missing your kid because she's not there to make noise.
Being a wife means: Thinking—and actually caring—about what someone else other you and your kids want and need.
Being a business owner means: Friday night meetings. They should be liquid meetings but, surely, Amy and I are too tired by that time to even lift the glass up.
Out of the mouths of babes:
Today I ate: Fairly clean. I fought mid-day sweets urges, which definitely helped me not to derail come dinner time.
Today I drank: Water.
Work was: An exercise in sharing.
Today I learned: That when people tell you who they are, you should believe them.
I am: Still in my gym clothes at 6:12 pm.
Tomorrow I will: Be in those clothes until I shower much later tonight.

I'm an Ordinary Guy

Wednesday, June 25

Wake up: 6:30 am
Slept for: I have absolutely no idea.
First thought was: Good lord, it's sunny.
Baby was: About to wake up.
This was: Fine.
Daughter was: Fast asleep—in our bed.
This was: Same as it ever was.
Man was: Sleeping not so soundly.
This was: A shame since he went to bed so late because he was working on our July issue.
Emails to check: I forgot to pay attention, but I know it was less than yesterday.
Goal for the day: To not stress out over all the things I'd like to accomplish.
Kabbalah says: Don't react.
First saving-the-world thought: We could really leverage THE FAMILY GROOVE to do some good. I think I'll write a book called Keep It Simple, Sister on how to eliminate chaos from your life in order to create success.
First bananas thought: I'll promote the book on Larry King. It's doable.
Arrive at gym: 7:23
Weight is: No time to check.
Weight to lose: Probably about the same as yesterday.
Workout is: 30 minutes, 310 calories burned, heart rate up to 140.
Today's song is: Burning Down the House by Talking Heads
Best lyric is: "Watch out! You might get what you're after."
Best spam subject line: I freaked her out with this thing
I want: Someone else to put sunscreen on my three year old so I don't have to stop working.
I love: The sounds I hear from my office
I wish: I had an assistant.
I am totally, majorly obsessing over: The half of Pop Tart I ate for no reason.

Check back later for the rest!

Being a mom means: Infrequent showers
Being a wife means: Caring more about showering.
Being a business owner means: Staying in the ring.
Today I ate: Well. I didn't even use up all of my points, but I still ate too much sugar. Sugar is the devil. I was craving something sweet, so I would up eating three tablespoons of strawberry jelly. Hello! Why not just eat three tablespoons of straight sugar?
Today I drank: Two measly 10-ounce glasses of water and way too much coffee.
Heard at my dinner table: "Deal with it," as said by my three year old.
Work was: Productive. The new issue is live and super mega fabulous.
I am: Sitting in a towel with my wet, uncombed hair dripping onto my office chair—because I was anxious to do a few things for work now that the little people are sleeping and, apparently, the three minutes it takes to dry off and comb my hair was just too long.
Tomorrow I will: Drink more water, eat less jelly, do the elliptical for ten more minutes and be more grateful.